We’re going strong.. our minds are clearer……the  bulges aren’t so bulgy….we’re not so easily annoyed…we have control…we’re making wise choices..we’re feeling on top of the world …everything fits……and then CRASH BANG BOOM! It all falls apart and we say it’s okay tomorrow is a new day! I’ve had many new days…if only those new days were controled days I wouldn’t  still be spinning.Hoping that something will click…..and treats will be treats and not an every day or every week event.Hmmmmmm………like a washing machine on a spin cycle…….it’s exhausting…really it’s just exhausting.I remember years ago my cousin saying we should go live on an island where everyone is obese…( it exists) .I actually think of this very often.However we wouldn’t feel very good……maybe we would be accepted but really who feels good carrying extra weight? I don’t that’s for sure.Along with the  washing machine you are imagining spinning right now….well my head follows the exact same pattern.When will it all stop? When will I not reach for the bread and butter that I promised not to eat that evening…..or at least have a piece and not five or six…..YA I said five or six you heard me…….or resisting the goodies offered at staff  meetings…the scone that I have just spent an hour looking at wondering if I’ll cave……why at one point did all this not matter and now it’s become such a fight again……could someone tell me why? There was a time not so long ago that food was no longer on the top ten challenges or worries in my life….it was easy….what was different then? I remember thinking how simple it was and it WAS…….and then back to the drawing board…..please tell me why? I sat back the other day and thought of a group of friends I once went to meetings with.All fighting the fight together….feeling brave..strong….giving it our all.Sadly years later after all of us had shed hundreds of pounds and gained them back more times than I’d care to share I could safely say none of us have kept it off or for that matter are at our healthy weight….we’re all still testing different weight loss ideas out…..makes me sad actually.I could honestly say that if you don’t have a weight problem you will never,ever,ever know the pain that riddles through so many of us…..the strong  fight we fight…..like a man will never know what it is to give birth to a baby……words cannot express how many of us feel on a daily bases….I share this again so that whom ever is reading this knows that they are not alone….we must keep on trying and never give up on the idea that it will one day happen.Our day will come,that switch will come back on and it will all make sense again……don’t give up and remember we are more than our weight!