Please allow me to bring you back to my favorite home in TMR.The house was always full…such treasured memories when I think back to those days.Cousins from New Jersey would come in the summer time,my moms sister and her family.( The Scottish side) I remember all of us sleeping on our  basement floor on a big huge round carpet that had all kinds of colours in it.Behind us was a huge chalkboard on the wall that had chains on either side that turned into a table when my  parents entertained…so cool.Lets not forget the secret rooms off to the right of the basement where we would play for hours and hours….mostly memories with my bestie D! I know she remembers it all.My dad always had cousins from out of town as well,from Lebannon and Brazil.One memory stands out so clearly. A Dr friend ,another Uncle,was in from Lebannon.He apparently was an  amazing ENT and guess what? He was a hypnotist !  He hypnotized people ….wow. At my young age I was going to participate in this.We were perhaps 6-8 people,not too sure.We were in our cozy den in our split level. I was all covered up in my cuddly blanket that my Nana made .I rememeber watching  someone go under and we were all laughing uncontrollably watching them do these silly things…..then the next memory I have is still fuzzy but I certainly remember the purpose of it all and being extremely upset.He was trying to find out why I always had a towel around me when outside at the pool or a blanket when inside of  the house……WHY? Well,my guess was I was hiding myself…after all this is what I had to do for whatever reason.How does such a young child get to feel like this? I want to say I know why but I’m not absolutely sure so….I was very young, maybe anywhere from the age of 6 on……..where did all of this come from? I was obviously ashamed of my body at such a young age…was I under or do I remember the chatter afterwards? I do remember being terribly hurt and ashamed  that this all came up in front of an audience……I was hurting.Today, I do spot the children at the pool,beach and elsewhere who have a little extra  fluffiness about them and when I do see them hiding under their towels or covered up in warm clothing when it’s scorching hot outside I can’t help but to wonder.I want to pull them away and tell them how wonderful they are and to embrace who they are…….in my heart I hope that this blog and any of the ones I have written and will come to write help someone somewhere…..the child,teenager,parent……